ME saving Gavin while Ethan is attacking me.Ethan has turned to be a pretty big handful, but I believe it is mostly my fault. Brad and I have given Ethan options and choices as a 2 yr old, in which he has learned to bargain his way into anything. Brad has mentioned that he thinks I am the only mother in the world that puts all of Ethan's snacks on the bottom shelf for him to reach, or a mother that teaches Ethan to do things all on his own. Sometimes I think I give Ethan too much freedom, to me its like this...I pick my battles and these ones just don't seem to bad. Like today, he started to sticker my face and before I knew it my hair was stickered along with my forehead in backyardigains. I showed him how to water the plants, and now there is a water trial to the plants pretty much everyday. Can I blame him? He watches me do everything and absorbs it all, of course wanting to try it out, so I let him. That is how my contacts ended up on the bathroom floor, or he covered himself in hairspray, or why his armpits of his shirt always smell like Brad's deodorant. Believe it or not, the kid can actually flip a pancake and crack eggs into a bowl with minimal shells at the age of 2. Our struggle really is power, so I am learning to empower Ethan while still holding the power.
This is a picture of Ethan yelling at Gaving to stop touching him, poor Gavin, just look at Ethan how he refuses to even touch the kid. So much for a family picture!This has been challenging but rewarding as well. He is becoming more obedient and eager to please as I am learning a new round of patience. I love my child dearly and can see how he is affected by Gavin sharing his mommy. I hope and pray all the time that he will accept his little brother and love him, soon. I know Ethan means well, but also wants to be a little boy loved my his mommy all to himself. I just don't know what to do. Should I love him and give him alone time, which encouraged this behavior. Or do I integrate Gavin into Ethan's time so he can learn that Gavin is his brother and loves him too. I am so confused with this issue, it breaks my heart everyday to see how Ethan treats Gavin and is desperate for me. I feel like I am doing something wrong! I hate it. This is one of those things that you just have to keep moving forward with that you never expected or planned for. Good thing Gavin loves Ethan and cracks up at him, even when Ethan is doing something mean to him. hmmph.
7 comments:
I must have been very lucky, Carson loved Parker from day one. I don't ever remember a time that Carson hit, poked, or hurt Parker, (well at least when Parker was a baby). They are making up for lost time now I guess. I wish I had more advice, but I know this is common and it will probably just pass with time. Good luck and I like your make-over!
Nice stickers! :)
I think you're not doing anything wrong at all! Ethan has a personality all his own, and he is at the age where he wants to test his boundaries all the time, but still needs and craves support and reinforcement. I tell Wyatt out loud that I love him and let him hear me tell Jana I lvoe her- then I tell Wyatt I love Jana and tell Jana I love Wyatt- then it turns into we love Daddy, we love Skeeter yes we do, and pretty soon we're singing- but the point I was going for is that I have tried to drive the point home that mommy loves everyone, and nobody more or less than the other. Alone time with each child is important too, but at this age I find feeding Jana is good alone time, and playing cars while she's asleep makes good Wyatt time. Oh, he's laughing like a lunatic in the kitchen, I better investigate soon. Monica, you are a wonderful mother. You give Ethan so many learning opportunities and he understands SO much for a little guy! Keep using your good mommy judgement and the spirit, and one day those boys will see that they are part of a family and that they have pretty much the most amazing mom ever.
Just heard Wyatt's bowl of eggs hit the floor. Gotta go. :)
Okay...so why does your blog say that you posted at 1:15 AM? What are you doing up so late? I loved listening to your list of things Ethan has done. It really helps me mentally know "I'm not the only one" and "If Monica can do it so can I"! The whole independence thing is great till it's not. I tell myself that it will get better and they will grow out of it. But now that I think about it, Kaden and Ethan will be able to water the plants all by themselves eventually. But when they get to that point, we will have another 2-yr-old to manage. What were we thinking? It's a vicious cycle.
Super cute pictures!! Between the stickers and the arrangement of stuffed animals in the crib, Ethan is quite the artist = )
What you talk about is a struggle for me (especially when all 3 are BAWLING at me at the same time!!) I try alone time with each of them. Taylor loves girls day out, Dylan loves to go on a walk, and Jared loves it all....just with mom. I want to teach as much as I can while they still listen to me because I know indepedence will come soon enough. Your smack on with choosing your battles. Its not worth it to wage war.
Monica, You are doing a fantastic job. Give yourself credit and continue to roll with the punches (hopefully not Ethans though!!!)
hey crazy sticker head lady!! you and your boys are so so cute:)
I bought those same stickers yesterday at our Dollar Tree 1/4 mile from our house. I bought a prize a day for the first week, and the stickers were the first thing I picked up. (I have to do something to keep her entertained for three weeks) As far as picking your battles-I TOTALLY AGREE! It's not worth it to fight them on everything. You're a great mom, tell Brad he's nuts. :) Love you too Brad-
Oh I love your pictures!!! I think the stickers suit you well! I'm sorry your little boy is such a smart and independant little stud. That can be challenging, but also make you proud at the same time. I love the last pict, poor Gavin looks stunned by Ethan hollering at him!!! Just wait soon enough Gavin will be returning the oldtime favors back to Ethan for all he has put him through!!!
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